Breaking News!! Mommy “Cleaning Influencer” Can’t Get Hubby To “Do Jack Shit!!”

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Des Moines, IA

Local internet hero, Marcy’s Mommy and Mommy Cleaning Influencer Jean Johnson, author of the highly popular “Clean With Jean” advice blog, can’t get her hubby, and Marcy’s Daddy Clark, to “do jack shit!!” according to reports. 

Despite numerous articles preaching to other Mommy’s about the best ways to clean, and doing so 5 or 6 times a day, the 28 year old Mommy can only stare at disbelief at the bag full of trash, which she strategically placed near the door to the garage this morning, for her hubby to take out.

Watch. It will sit here until I announce ‘I guess I am taking out the trash’ and then he will show up with a camera” she told reporters.

“How hard would it be to just pick it up and take it out?” I have tried everything I can think of.  I’ve even left friendly handmade reminders in the drawer reserved for his Calvin Klein socks, the most comfortable sock a man can get, that he does not even look at.  I know this because I put it near his Christian Dior cologne which smells amazing!   In fact, his job is to film me doing things like that all day, so he literally took a photo of me putting it in there, so he knows what it is…

Pretty Clean Actually…

Then I remembered that I was an influencer.  I thought “hey, maybe if he sees me cutting the grass in my comfy and super cute fleece jogging suit by Janzen and looking amazing, then he would want to do it too.  Nope.  He just says “the yard looks great babe and takes pictures of me doing it” with a big stupid smile on his face. 

He acts like he is just some dude who only needs to show up for photoshoots and take pictures of me doing everything.”

We reached out to Marcy’s Daddy Clark for comment.  He said, and we quote, “What am I supposed to do?  She makes me take pictures of her cleaning.  The other day we tried out like 4 vacuums.  I don’t know which one was the best, but I can tell you that one of them was.  That floor was clean!

Same goes with the dishes, her sweeping, her putting detergent in the washing machine, scrubbing the toilets, mopping the floor etc…  Mopping the floor gets done like 15 times a week at my house, and with 15 new products.  You can see your reflection in the linoleum. 

So then one day I look outside and she is cutting the grass, so I figured it was just a new sponsor and started taking pictures…”

When told that his spouse was attempting to influence him to mow the grass, Marcy’s Daddy Clark thought for a moment before saying, and we quote “interesting…so how would that work anyway?  If I am her primary photographer, and she is doing something like cleaning a counter, then I can’t really do it while she is influencing me, right?  I mean I was literally there taking pictures and videos of her cleaning the counter.  I am not going to do it again after that, at any rate… that thing probably gets cleaned 25 times a day anyway”

*Updated*

We followed up with, Marcy’s Mommy Jean and asked “so like how can you influence the person taking photo’s of you influencing him?   In a prepared statement just released, Marcy’s Mommy Jean stated, and we quote, “I will have to get back to you on that.  How does someone influence the camera man, while you are influencing him to clean, and he is filming you influencing him to clean?  That is an amazing question and it is too much to handle right now…”

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